Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
