Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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