I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
