from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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