Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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