I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Bring me that man meat
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
