a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
