We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
