Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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