You can't motorboat a personality
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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