nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
