He is such a slut. More and more my type.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
