I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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