direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
