Define "chronic" masturbator.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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