Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
