Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize