I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Randomize
