how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
