i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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