i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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