So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
