that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
