why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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