i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
