I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
