dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
