Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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