what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
