Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
