your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Randomize
