Yo dont text me then not text me
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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