Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
