in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize