i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize