We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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