Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
