I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm like, not good at living.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
