Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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