So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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