Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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