yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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