we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
