i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
These tits shall not be calmed
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
