would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
