pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
