I showed him my bush... on skype.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
