thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
