eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
