Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
