You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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