I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
