Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
